Under normal circumstances, if a woman is comfortable, relaxes sufficiently, and becomes well lubricated, she will not feel pain or aching during the first intercourse, and there may not even be any bleeding. However, if women tense up due to their fears and are not sufficiently lubricated, having intercourse becomes difficult, and it may even be impossible for intercourse to take place.
Vaginismus When we ask women who experience the problem, “Why do you think you developed vaginismus?” many say that they heard exaggerated stories about pain, bleeding, and “locking,” and that they were greatly affected by them. In some cases, there are incorrect attitudes or pressure from the husband or partner, or sexual traumas. Some answer, “I don’t know.” And when they say “I don’t know,” it generally indicates that there was a negative experience that was lived, heard, or seen before the age of 6. This could be rape, harassment, or incest, or it could be seeing or hearing the parents during intercourse.
For this reason, until the age of 6, negative things related to sexuality that could affect the child should not be talked about or watched in the child’s presence; the parents’ bedroom door should be kept locked, and sound insulation should be very good. In addition, providing sexual education in our schools is also very important. This education should be given before children learn incorrect and incomplete information from the environment and family. Because incorrect and incomplete information sows the seeds of these fears. And when exaggerated stories of pain and bleeding are added to this, fears are reinforced and may cause a woman to develop vaginismus.
